Fifteen-odd years ago I would have said that we didn't need feminism. It was done and we didn't need someone to advocate for women.
Now with a few more years experience (and nothing makes you feel older than writing "fifteen-odd years ago" and still feeling like it was recent!) I have realised that sexism is still alive and well. And the saddest thing is that my daughter experienced it, or she would have had I not intervened. It made me so sad and angry to have to advocate for her to do something that she was not considered for solely due to her gender. It wasn't her age. It was that she is a girl. Had she been older it would have still been the same. Even writing this now gives me a kind of sick-sad feeling at the bottom of my stomach.
Growing up in an all girl family through the 80's gave me a lot of protection from sexism. The "Girls can do anything" advertising was all around. My parents never made me think that as a girl who would be a woman that I was any less capable or able than a boy who would be a man. Dad would always say he was happy with his three healthy girls and never wished any of us were a boy. He took me to rugby games and my Nana gave me a All Black sweatshirt that I'd wear during test matches. I learned a lot from watching rugby with Dad. In short I was raised to do the best I could and what I wanted to do. The fact that I was a girl was simply something that was. It was part of life.
The problem with sexism, racism, ageism is that it forgets the most basic thing of all - that all people are precious and we must treasure the intrinsic beauty that exists within us because we are all created by God and loved the same. Of course we all have different strengths. We have different personalities and some of those things might be shown in women or men more dominantly - or not. I am not saying that we should all BE the same or all DO the same things, that's not feminism. I mean that we are all worth the same, we should be equally valued and given the same opportunities regardless of gender. Whether we take those opportunities or not lies with us. But the choice should be made by the individual and not another person or institution based on gender.
It breaks my heart to think that my little girls are not as special as my little boy. My kids are different not just because of their gender but also because of their personalities and interests. And they will develop that as they get older. But their intrinsic worth is still the same. We will do our best to give our children the same opportunities. I love watching Dion with our kids actually. He built a playhouse recently for the kids and it was C who was up there handing him nails and hammers and who stuck around while he was doing it, long after her brother had disappeared off to do something else. She's got stickability.
There is also the more scary stuff... the fact that women are more likely to be abused in relationships (another situation where the intrinsic worth of someone is not respected or even acknowledged). Women becomes the target of welfare change because they are often left holding the babies. Women take longer to pay off student loans and earn less than a man dollar for dollar. The glass ceiling is still there.
Hopefully we'll raise our children to value the worth of others regardless of gender, race, age or religion. Hopefully our children will be able to stand up for themselves. I have no doubt that C will be capable of making herself heard as she gets older ;) and I am glad. Seems like she's still going to need to be a voice for others.
